Furiously Bri

The walls are thick

Keeping me inside

The thoughts loud

The fear creeping up my throat

Nothing to scream out

Because who would hear me

Aside from the fear itself?

OCD is like digging a grave

Shovel still in hand

Burying yourself without noticing

Tons of dirt weighing on your chest

Guilt in your mind

Feeling like judgment is near

But you’re only judging yourself

The trauma whispering, “you did this”

I respond, “I didn’t ask for it though”

But it doesn’t matter, because it’s too late

I push people away

Because I was ignored

Then I ignore myself

Then I rot

I decay

I

Rise

I climb

I fight the thoughts

I reach for your hand

You remind me that it’s just a bad day

I don’t have to do this by myself

I can always try again without the shame

I climb out of the hole, looking at the tombstone

It’s no longer my name

It simply says,

“Not Today”

© FuriouslyBri